Ursus: One of Lucillus' first songs, and always a popular one, except perhaps with the principals involved. I haven't performed it since Magor became a Tuchuk, since I don't have a death wish.

Lucillus: One night, Magor decided he wanted to..... introduce Arundor to the manly arts of love. We chased him through the woods all night, but..... read the lyrics. By the following Ragnarok, Magor had tired of Arundor (and the little bugger was really fast!), so he decided to seek a new "Chosen One". Valharic hid in the bushes for the rest of the night, and ran in terror whenever he heard Magor was coming.

HAIL TO MAGOR'S CHOSEN
By Lucillus
Dedicated to Arundor, the first and, of course,
that doddering old Tuchuk, Magor the Pale
(Sung to the tune of "Puff, the Magic Dragon")

(CHORUS)
Hail to Magor's Chosen!
I hope it isn't me.
There he goes with wicked grin,
Who will his victim be?
Although he has a lady,
At times it's not enough.
He likes to spend his manly seed
In manner rough and tough.

Girls are not his target,
Boys are what he seeks.
He likes them young and sturdy
As he pries between their cheeks.
When his need arises,
He won't be denied,
No pleas for mercy will he hear,
There's no place you can hide!

(CHORUS)

First there came Arundor,
Fleet of foot was he,
We chased him through the woods all night
And tied him to a tree.
Then forever after
He'd watch old Magor fight,
Was he just reliving
His fond memories of that night?

(CHORUS)

Next there was Valharic,
Such a pretty boy.
With all those dimples and cute curls
For Magor to enjoy.
Alas, he was not worthy,
He cringed and cried and moaned,
Ran screaming to his parents
When he thought he might get boned.

(CHORUS)

Who will next be chosen?
One thing is for sure,
Another boy will be abused
As long as he endures.
Young boys must be careful
When Magor is around,
He's always looking for a fresh
Young victim he can pound!

(CHORUS)

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